The Omnymphotents, Book Four: Twists and Trysts

 

Salamando: Alright, fine, one more book! You can buy it on my Smashwords page at: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/1496482. Now will you all get off my back for a while?
 
Cyl: Oh, don’t act like you don’t love it when we tap on your brain!
 
Salamando: No, I’m serious! This is it! No more Salamando books! Salamando is retired! I’m done!
 
Cyl: Uh-huh. You said that before, and yet here we are. And we are grateful for it, so thank you.
 
Osha: Yeah, I was a little miffed you tried to end things right after my debut, but I got to do a bunch of stuff this time around!
 
Illia: I also appreciate the extended screentime.
 
RoseGold: And I appreciate you deciding to include me after all.
 
Opal: Big same!
 
Shady: Yeah, well, goody for you bitches, but I barely got to do more than make cameos this time around! Sal! You better make a Book Five with me front and center!
 
Opal: Damn, Mom, one whole story was about you helping to make me, that wasn’t good enough for you? I see how it is!
 
Shady: You barely got to do anything either!
 
RoseGold: Fret not, all we need do is continue tapping on our author’s brain every once in a while.
 
Salamando: No, look, I like you all as a cast, and yeah, it was nice to able to get more done with you, but I mean it. The Salamando Era is finished.
 
Cyl: What about the mortal adventures stuff? You never did publish that one.
 
Salamando: Actually, I just went back and added all the Empowered and Created stories to Book One. So, some people might want to go back and get the new version. I’m not going to write any more of those, and there wasn’t enough material to make it its own bundle, I felt. They fit the earlier tone of the series better anyway.
 
Cyl: Ah. Well, I suppose that works.
 
Osha: Hey, I don’t see the Wayfarer stuff included! What about them? You’re not going to just abandon that, are you?
 
RoseGold: You only care about that because your Avatar is involved.
 
Osha: Yeah, what’s your point? }:3
 
Salamando: Man, I don’t know. If I really want to do a serious attempt at the Didsy stories, it’s probably going to have to be in some form not related to the Omnyverse. She’s really much more one of my genre-fic characters, so I kinda feel like she’d be getting held back being linked to all my taboo erotica baggage. No offense.
 
Osha: Aw, that’s no fun! C’mon, you can still do smutty adventure stories! People love those!
 
Salamando: No! I don’t just write erotica, goddamn it! I swear!
 
Shady: Aw, don’t try so hard to be such a born-again prude! Omnymphotents Book Five, Sal! Make it happen!
 
Salamando: I told you I’m done!
 
Cyl: That remains to be seen! Possibly-maybe see you next book, folks!

The Omnymphotents, Book Three: Cosmic Affairs

Sal: It’s been a hell of a year! I can’t quite believe it, but we somehow got enough stories to fill a massive, throbbing third eBook! You can purchase it on Smashwords at: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/1133398
 
Kat: Good work, Sal! I’m proud of you.
 
Cyl: We all are.
 
Sal: I guess someone has to be.
 
Reignbeau: Is being a self-flagellating sourpuss your brand or something?
 
Cyl, Kat, Demi, Wyllow, Sal: Yes.
 
Sal: Nah, but seriously. You’re the first cast of characters in a very long time that I’ve really been able to stick with long-term and make something out of. Well, relatively speaking, of course. I’m just the cringey self-insert Author Avatar. But dubious existentialism aside, I’m fairly happy with how things turned out.
 
Cyl: Me, too. Who’d have guessed that one-shot joke short from a couple years ago would have led to all of this?
 
Sal: Creativity is funny that way.
 
Osha: So, um, is this really it? Our series is over now? I just got here!
 
Sal: It’s the last of the “core series”, but it’s hardly the end of the Omnyverse. There’s still plenty of material to work with for more spin-offs, more stand-alone Omny stories, alternate media projects, etc. I guess you could consider this the “lore” side of the project, getting you all established and building your characters in ways the old Omny stories never really tapped into. Besides, you know our Author. Just because he says he’s done doesn’t mean he really is.
 
Demi: So there’s still a ton of adventures yet to be told.
 
Wyllow: And lots of sexy shenanigans yet to behold!
 
Illia: And plenty of mysteries yet to unfold.
 
Jax: I haven’t said anything yet, but I’ll cut in now, so I’m not left out in the cold.
 
Cyl: Salamando sure expanded the cast, didn’t he? Makes me feel kinda old.
 
Kat: Yeah, since the last book, we’ve increased by twofold!
 
Reignbeau: We already used “-fold”, now it’s you I shall scold.
 
Osha: Say what you will, but our banter’s pure gold!
 
Sal: You people drive me to drink.
 
Cyl: Happy reading, folks! And thanks for all your support!

The Omnymphotents, Book Two: Omny Ex Machina

 

Megan: Huh. He actually did it. Salamando published our second eBook. If you actually want to give him money for some reason, you can purchase it at: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/1127106

Cyl: Told you to have some faith.

Megan: Faith is for mortals.

Shady: Well, you coulda made a better sales pitch.

Domina: This is the story where I finally make my debut! What better pitch do you need than that?

Megan: Where we make our debut, you mean.

Domina: Same difference. The point is, I/we save the Omnyverse. Funny how that works out, isn't it? You're all welcome.

Shady: Excuse you, red, but you didn't exactly solo this bit. This story wouldn't even have happened if not for me and Cyl.

Domina: You didn't go far enough.

Cyl: We went exactly as far as we had to. Everything worked out.

Shady: Spoilers, jeez.

Megan: All the stories are still free on the website, doofus.

Shady: It was a joke, nerd. Speaking of, shame he wasn't able to put the comics in there.

Cyl: Well, he had to compromise by rewriting them in "quick-prose" as he calls it. Plus, there is a little bit of new material in the form of another foreward, and a new opening Prelewd chapter.

Shady: I suppose it'll do! Anyway, folks, stay tuned for Book Three! Which one will that be again?

Cyl: Next up should be the Empowered/Created collection, after that, I think the post-reset stuff still has some work to be done before it gets booked, so that might be awhile.

Shady: Get on it Sal!

Salamando: I workin' on it! Cut me some slack!

Shady: No.

Cyl: See you next book, folks!

The Omnymphotents, Book One: Through Mortal Eyes

Lettie: Hooray! Our first eBook! You can purchase it at Salamando's Smashwords page, at: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/1126539

Shady: It's about damn time! How long has he been sitting on that cover?

Cyl: About two months.

Shady: What took him so damn long?

Cyl: Well, you know how he is. He thought he was going to have to write a whole new novel to start us off for a potential new audience. Got stuck trying to decide what origin to go with. Again.

Devi: You'd think he would have learned by now.

Cyl: He's getting there.

Whitney: Is that supposed to be me on the cover?

Lettie: You look great!

Cyl: It's the best stock photo he could find to match the feel of us, but I think it works well.

Shady: Not jealous it's not you on the cover?

Cyl: I'm just happy we have a book of our own.

Shady: Uh-huh.

Cyl: Spare me your projection, please.

Shady: Never!

Devi: "Through Mortal Eyes"? What is that supposed to mean?

Whitney: It's a collection of our earliest stories, the tales where Sal first wrote about us. All of those were told through our Plaything's perspectives. Takes you back, doesn't it?

Devi: Ah, yes, the good old days, back when there was no plan whatsoever, and we all had maybe half a dimension of personality.

Lettie: C'mon, cut him some slack. We were just starting off! We were basically just a writing exercise experiment back then.

Devi: We're still a writing experiment. It was just nice and uncomplicated back then.

Shady: Enjoy it while it lasts, readers! After this, things immediately go off the rails! Not that I'm complaining!

Cyl: Let's be real, if it didn't, we probably wouldn't still be around. But with that said, readers, look forward to Book Two! Sal's going to have to do some rewriting to get that one to fit the ebook, but it should be out soon!

Salamando: Please don't make promises on my behalf.

Cyl: Please actually make the book.

Salamando: Fine. Gawd.

Cyl: Soon, please.

Salamando: Don't rush me!

Lettie: See you again real soon, folks!

Salamando: What did I just say?!